One year and four months ago I recovered from an Ice addition.
I met a girl who was fun to be around and we both enjoyed each others company. We both did the weekend benders together . It was one particular night when coming back from a night club she asked me to snort what I thought was speed. Days later she could not bear to lie to me any more and admitted I had been snorting ICE.
I was puzzled as to why she would do this if she cared for me and knowing how highly addictive it was as she herself was a chronic user.
It then made sense why I could not sleep for hours and hours afterwards.
Shortly after she introduced me to the pipe. I call it “the devil” I wanted it. I was addicted in no time. This is when I began to spiral out of control, it made me forget about everything and everyone. It numbed my pain – the pain I was unable to handle seeing my Aunty suffer from a Grade 5 brain tumor… the more I saw her in pain the more I wanted the drug. I was iced off my head when she died and I was iced off my head at the funeral. I’d seen my wonderful grandfather and other young aunty pass… I never got over their deaths…. so this drug brought everything to the surface that I had been suppressing. I became paranoid 24/7 and began to hate myself. I couldn’t stand the site of my own family, and wished bad things would happen to them, I even stole money from them to support my addiction. Several times I wanted to end my life and spent time trying to work out ways to do it. It felt like everyone and everything was against me. I lost faith, I stopped believing. All I could think about was getting high all the time with this girl. She used me and abused our relationship, I wanted her to like me more and more, it is like she became like a drug too. I bought her her drugs, shouted her and her friends cocaine, speed every second weekend, drugs, alcohol, you name it i did it.
Before I knew it I was dealing cocaine, speed, pills and the devil “ICE”!! I found myself involved with the wrong people, including well known drug lords known to the Police. I got in too deep too fast, and ended up partying with them all over Melbourne. Being seen with them was cool at the time, private parties, stuff you see in the movies, sex, drugs and rock and roll.
There is a saying from the movie Scarface – “Don’t get high on your own supply” that is exactly what I did! I went for days with no sleep, became an alcoholic – drinking every day to calm myself. I became violent smashing windows with my bare hands ended up in hospital with a drug overdose. I almost ended up in jail and would not have been hear writing this if I didn’t ask my sister for help, deep deep down inside I wanted help.
The biggest challenge I had was confronting my Mum and Dad, especially my father, for months he knew there was something wrong, my Dad is not silly and has been around and seen a lot of things in his time. I remember looking at him and saying, “I have an ICE addiction… I need help.” All I remember is Dad embracing me, crying and telling me everything is going to be okay, that he loved me and would do anything to get his son back.
I’ve known Teymara for many years, as she was a close friend of my aunty, and did the two year journey with us all until my aunties passing as a result of a brain tumor. Through my aunty, I knew of Teymara’s amazing work through her Born To Be Free seminar plus her work getting kids off heroin, so it was to Teymara we turned for help.
I spent two pretty full on days in Teymara’s care, and it cleared my Ice addiction. I am so truly blessed. She helped save my life.
One year and four months have gone by and I am drug free, happy, have my own business, a beautiful fiance and a loving family… what more can I say but Thank God for Teymara and her support team.