teymara

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Teymara provides a safe, compassionate space for survivors of domestic violence, helping them rebuild confidence, heal emotional trauma, and reclaim their sense of power and purpose.

Teymara works with both children and adults who have been victims of domestic violence.

Domestic violence, whether brief or inflicted over many years, scars an individual on many levels – emotionally, mentally and physically. Damage is also done at a subconscious level and this is where it’s hardest to heal.

Teymara has found that no matter what process of healing the victim has gone through before coming to her, the emotional, mental and physical trauma stills remains at some level. This is the case because the subconscious creates negative neurological and emotional pathways at the time the abuse occurs as the action whether mental, emotional or physical registers as a trauma. Unless transformed, the individual is forever connected to the memory and the emotions formed around the abuse.

Teymara’s work involves transforming the negative thoughts, emotions and fears the abuse created so that the individual can start to move forward with their lives. She also provides practical coaching to assist victims to effectively support their children (if children were involved) and re-establish their new life in a violent-free setting.

You can view Teymara’s VIP transformational sessions here

I feared someone I loved – that shouldn’t be a normal thing for an 8 year old to go through. For as long a I could remember mum and dad never really got along, from verbal disagreements to the days he would talk her out of doing something she wanted to do. He began taking his anger and issues out on not only mum but my younger brothers and me, shouting, hitting and projecting his frustrations upon us. When mum kicked him out I was at school and oblivious to what was happening at home. The abuse continued once he left. My family continually lived in a state of fear whilst I stayed in a state of denial, blocking my ears and turning all of my attention toward music. My brothers began seeing him and occasionally soon after I joined them. We always had the worst time, he never had anything for us to eat and was constantly passed out drunk.

My brothers began coming home crying and I decided to stop seeing him, within a month my brothers decided to stop seeing him too and that’s when he began stalking us even at school. My emotions at the time are indescribable, there almost seemed to be nothing there. I never wanted to engage in social activities or leave the house. My denial turned into hatred and uncomfortable feelings as l felt I had no control. After seeing Teymara and doing Born To Be Free things instantly changed. We still weren’t in the best position but our outlook on it all was different. I continued to be in denial for two days after the seminar but my attitude started to change and all of a sudden I wanted to do things, go out and see people which is something I wouldn’t have wanted to do before. We are a lot happier now and I had the confidence and courage after the seminar to change schools so I can follow my dreams and creative passions.

13yr old girl who experienced domestic violence Name withheld

I met Teymara when I was 20 after being forced to attend her Born To Be Free seminar by my eldest brother. He had been referred to her and had found her work extremely beneficial – to the point where it would eventually become life changing. I was rebellious and angry and didn’t like her and didn’t want to participate in her seminar. Over the years with maturity I’ve come to realize that Teymara being part of my life and that of my family’s has been an amazing Blessing. T is a guiding light, she is a very skilled teacher if you’re ready to listen. She always works from integrity which I personally regard very highly. Her work helps you to uncover one of your greatest gifts —-the gift of true clarity. I often wonder if I would be alive today if I hadn’t found her. That’s something I will never know however, I will be forever grateful to my brother for bringing her into my life. For the first time in my life I’m telling my story in the hope that something can be done to heal those caught in the web of Domestic Violence so what happened to my mother and her then partner never has to happen again.

After Born To Be Free you feel more clear and your system is empty and you can get along with your life instead of worrying about stuff in the past. What Teymara does is instead of running into the wall – you clear it and get over it and forget about the things holding you back.

Name withheld (12yr old boy)

When I did Born To Be Free – a lot of things changed with me and my brother and sister. I did not have to be there for them all the time – I didn’t always need to be their back foot.

I couldn’t go to school because I was scared and since doing the Sunday with Teymara I feel safe and can focus and I don’t worry anymore. I am carefree now and I do not have any panic attacks like I used to.

I feel good, like I have a weight off my shoulders – I don’t have to worry about my Dad anymore.

Name withheld (12yr old boy)

I am the mother of these children - we have been victims of an emotionally manipulative and violent relationship, which controlled all of our lives for well over 10 years. We had engaged in lengthy court battles and paid a fortune to many people. A protection order was put in place and continually breached, with repeated ‘threats to kill me’ made to the children one of many breaches.

We eventually became so fearful that we ran away and hid, we all had emotional melt downs, panic attacks, high anxiety and were not sleeping. The system had failed us on too many times occasions, and I didn’t know what to do anymore.

The children were suffering at school and did not attend for most of 2014. They did not sleep well (constant waking and nightmares), one of them was self harming too. I was desperate - I realised I did know something that had worked and had turned my life around back in 2009 (the courage to leave an abusive relationship) Born To Be Free – so, I picked up the phone called Teymara.

The children and I attend the Sunday program in April, 2015 and all I can say is THANK GOD, for Born To Be Free and Teymara’s work.

What unfolded in the weeks post the program was truly amazing.

All three children not only were laughing (a lot), singing (a lot), there were no more meltdowns, no out of control conflicts and they were happy again - they were finally FREE of what was holding them back.

As their mother, I had noticed changes as early as driving home from the program Sunday night, I did expect to see some changes, however, when I received phone calls from both teachers about the positive changes in all of them I was totally blown away, they all wanted to know what had happened over the school holiday break. Born To Be Free – works. It really does.

Since Born To Be Free… their attendance at school is near 100% with no battles, they love learning (and now can learn), and are creating positive outcomes for themselves.

All three are now past their trauma and can now absorb their world. They now feel they have a future to look forward too. One of the boys was School Captain, Junior Rotarian and Dux of the School all within 8 months of doing the seminar.

We all now want to get out there in the world and experience life, this is a complete 360 degree change. My children along with myself are on a much brighter, happier path, one at times we all felt was out of reach.

- Testimonial from a mother of the two above

NOW FOR MY STORY……….

I know most people could not have endured all of the challenges I’ve had to face in my 43 years and remain intact. It is my exceptional strength, an inner knowing and the gift of having a very special woman (Teymara) enter my life 23 years ago that has given me the clarity, understanding, and tools needed to successfully get through each and every one of them.

My list of negative life events is far too long and in depth to explore here however, I will talk about those that I believe were the main contributors to a lifelong struggle to heal my past and find ‘me’. The rots of this pain stemming from the knowledge of the physical and psychological abuse that my mother was subjected to by her father that I believe led to the volatile relationship she had with my father (and why she was attracted to him in the first place) and eventually to the man she left him for who was responsible for her murder and the hanging of himself.

I was born into a dysfuntional family, the 4th child of a family of 5 which was already complete. My parents were headed for an inevitable divorce and my oppressed mother who suffered from ongoing depression now found herself pregnant once again. This of course, for most women or European descent of the 70’s would mean remaining stuck in an unhealthy marriage for many more year with limited resources or support to get out. Knowing full well that she was not able to raise a 4th child my mother considered an abortion however was quickly put into fear by her GP and my father, forcing her to go through with an unwanted pregnancy and keep the baby.

My father did most of the child rearing in relation to me in the early years although my mother desperately tried through her depression. Perhaps this was a verbal agreement made between them in continuing with the pregnancy. Because of this situation dad was my source of love and security. I used to chase him down the street and try to stop him from going to work. I remember having to stand on my own two feet from very early on. I was a very mature 6 year old and seemed to have an insight which was way beyond my years. I seemed to know things that the other little kids at school didn’t. As I watched my other suffer I yearned to find the love and acceptance I so needed from her by transforming myself into whomever or whatever I needed to be to get it from others in the family friends and eventually men.

The arguments between my parents were relentless. Where most children including my 3 siblings would stand back or run away, I would put myself right in the firing line at risk of being physically hurt, the risk though outweighing my fear of losing one of them. I was on a 6 year old little girl and I would stand in between them fighting, mum often with a knife in her hand and dad with his fist ready to throw a punch. I would beg and scream for them to stop, hysterically running from one parent to the other pushing against my father pleading with him to leave the house so the fighting would end. The arguments would often occur at the dinner table setting the stage for the emotional eating patterns that l would battle against in my life that Teymara’s work has supported me in breaking.

After another 10 years the marriage finally ended with my mother entering a new relationship with the person who eventually murdered her. She had mentioned this man’s jealous and controlling tendencies however, at age 16 all I wanted was my parents to be happy.

At age 19 I was living with my father. I returned home at around 3am one morning after attending a party. As I drove closer to home I noticed all the light were on I knew there was something wrong I was panicked walking through the front door and frantically asking if my father was alright before looking and seeing him in the house. I remember yelling ‘What’s wrong?’ ‘What’s happened?’ my brother who was only 25 at the time and living with my mother held onto my shoulder and gently told me that our mother had died, that her partner had killed her’. The screams that came from me that night were screams I couldn’t stop.

Apparently my mother had spent a few nights at her partner’ house. It was Easter and along with attending church and the local social club, they had made arrangements to meet with his eldest daughter and grandchildren. When both could not be reached his daughter became concerned. Neighbors were contacted and found mums partner suspended by the neck in the garage. Police upon entering the house found my mother aged 52 on the kitchen floor in a pool of blood. Her partner had slit her carotid artery with a kitchen knife prior to going outside and hanging himself. The day of the death is unknown and so are the reasons for this tragedy.

If you know anyone who is caught in the web of domestic violence please try to support them as best you can to get help so that my mothers death doesn’t have to be in vain. Thank you.

-Name withheld